Friday, July 31, 2009

Big Day..

We have a lot going on today. 1st, and foremost, due to my ERROR in knowledge as to when school starts, I have decided to move up Penelope's visit with George. I want her to have as much time to process her emotions, act out, regress, whatever.. and get through it, before school starts.

So today is the day.

She doesn't know, but my dad wants me to tell her so we don't the issue that happened last time - which is, that she thought I didn't know and she was going to get in trouble for the entire visit until she asked my dad once George left. She had asked George, during a 30 second period of alone time, and his response was that he didn't think I knew. The issue was, she called me Mom, and George doesn't consider me her mom and assume she was talking about Harriet. So Penelope was worried the entire visit. But the purpose of not telling her is that her anxiety while waiting will skyrocket, and more importantly, if he doesn't show or is late - that would have horrible repercussions. Both her birth parents have timeliness issues, which only threw fuel on the fire when it came to Penelope's distrust of their love. It became a way she would measure their love for her. Especially Harriet. But with her fundamentally distrusting mindset, it's just really hard on her. And George was 20 minutes late last time - which is baffling to me since he hadn't seen her since the fall. He wasn't even upset or sorry. He felt it shouldn't be a problem since our dad told him that his 1 hour starts when he arrives - so it shouldn't matter when he shows up. But he'd been bitching about not seeing her and how he NEEDS to see her.. and he's 20 minutes late? Baffling..
So, I'm going to tell her on the way and talk about ways to keep herself calm until he arrives. There will probably be about an hour between when she gets there and he arrives but I'm not going to tell her that. If I put a time on his arrival, and he is late, then .. so I'm just going to tell her not right away but soon.. well, I'm still thinking about that. She is going to be a mess once I tell her. Maybe I can figure something else out... maybe call? I just called my dad and told him to have George call me when he is 10 minutes out. I can then call Penelope and have the talk with her and then a few short minutes later George will arrive. He thinks it's overboard but again - he doesn't understand the emotional side of this. But he's willing to play along with my dramatic demands. Ugh.
So we have that going on, then they are going to take her to see a move - just Grandma and Papaw. George only gets an hour.
While they are doing their thing, I'm meeting up with my other brother, his wife, kids, and a cousin who we haven't seen in years and her husband and son, who we haven't met. My nephew and her son are about the same age and have the same name. How coincidental, huh? So, we are doing all of that, tonight.
In prepartion of the the backlash of the visit, I have planned with Penelope some cleaning therapy for tomorrow at Papaw's. They have a bathroom that is worthy of Architectural Digest.. okay, maybe some local magazine, but it is super nice. It's almost allllll tile. It has one of those open showers that like 5 people could stand in, that steps right into this big Jacuzzi that's the size of a small pool. Anyway, the whole room needs some cleaning! I told Penelope we were going to surprise Papaw, as a "Thank You" for all that he does for us. She is excited about doing it! Now that she is in Happyland... we will see how she feels tomorrow, but it will challenge her and give her gratification and make her stronger by doing it. I also set up a bribe for her.. she found this expensive toys in a catalog that came in the mail. It's these little dolls for $12 a piece. I told her if she worked hard at staying strong and be in Happyland until school starts, I'd get them for her. Their expensive for what they are, but $24 dollars is worth it if she uses them to motivate her through this tough period. She just doesn't know that it is going to be tough.. not until tonight.
Now off to get ready for tonight. I plucked the unibrow and will have to figure out what to do about my overgrown deadend hair.. I feel like a mess on the inside and out.. and now I'm going to see family and they are going to think "Dang!" from the last time I've seen her, but I can't care about that anymore. It's like so much lower on my totem pole of worries right now. I'm just going to try to let all that go and have fun, and remember I can't control any of that and just make the best of it.

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