Talking about young kids saying the darnedest things, I have to share something that was just as funny as sweet that Penelope said a few days ago. I guess it's shouldn't be funny but understanding the behaviors of a child with RAD, even before the label was attached, it's still funny.
Back Story - Penelope is a very sentimental being. Even though she has issues with attachment, her loyalty and love of family is unmatched. When she really starts to learn the ability to attach and "let love in" as we call it, her ability to love will also go unmatched. Anyone who will have the privilege of having her love will be so lucky because it will be intense and huge.
She loves to be told stories of family and positive or funny events from her life. Also, I remind her of the love people have for her through examples/stories. One such story that she loves for me to tell her (over and over and over) is of her Uncle B. He is my twin brother and my best friend. Our relationship has changed over the years but we are always there for each other when we need it. But when we were in our early 20s, he was living at home and partying every night. Penelope was a just a little toddler at the time. I told Penelope how Uncle B wasn't really into little babies when she was born. I think it stemmed from a question about if Uncle B watched her when she was little. That or if he held her at the hospital. She likes to know who all held her at the hospital. But I told her Uncle B was busy with trying to find a girlfriend. Haha. I didn't want to tell her that she was a reminder as to why sex isn't always a good thing and he didn't like to be reminded.But I told her how one time when I was watching her at Grandma and Papaw's house, he was home and in his room watching tv. I had asked him if he could watch her for a minute, that I had to go get something. I was trying to get him to spend some time with his niece. He held her like one would hold a stinky diaper but he did it. I went upstairs and didn't come back for like 15 minutes. Small doses is what I thought. Her first Christmas, Penelope being the first "kid" in the family of her generation, we all went hog wild on the gifts. Except Uncle B. He bought her this rattle. He was very proud of it. It had Elmo and lit up when you shook it. But it was a rattle for crying out loud... But then the next year, we had Thanksgiving at her parents' house. She was sitting on a little hard plastic purple rocking horse. Uncle B started pushing down on the back of the rocking horse causing the front end to go up high in the air and helped the thing rock harder. Penelope giggled and laughed the entire time. At some point shortly afterwards he got tired, got up and starting walking into the kitchen. Over all the noise from all the different talking circles of adults, you heard her yell "UNCLE BRIAN!" in a tone that was like "where are you going?" She had never said his name before. She wasn't much of a talker at age 2. Everyone went silent and we all stared at Uncle B as he froze. He dropped his head and turned around and went back to Rocking Horse Attendent duty. She continued her laughing and giggling and it was very cute. A month later was Christmas and Uncle B this time showered her with gifts. "And every since, you've had a special place in his heart."
So, that's the story that I have told Penelope upon her prompting many times over the years. Then, the other day out of the blue she says "You know... I'm the reason Uncle B had kids."
If only she knew..
I had to tell Uncle B. It was too precious. I told him when we went to dinner with our cousin. We all laughed. It's not that we don't love her, but before we really knew there was something more than just bad parenting, from our perspective as young idealistic non-parents, Penelope was the child that you saw throw a huge tantrum in a restaurant or store because they didn't get their way. She was loud and uncontrolled. I knew that not all kids were like that but Uncle B wasn't so sure.
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