How EMDR is going

We've been going to the new trauma therapist for about 4 or 5 months now I think. Not every week but we try to go every week - it really just depends on her schedule. We really didn't start the EMDR process until about a month ago. And even then, I don't know if the therapist, I'll call Lisa, felt like Penelope was ready. Penelope had a rough summer and a bumpy beginning to her school year. Lisa wanted to make sure that attachment between Penelope and I is strong enough for me to help Penelope cope with the repercussions of facing her past trauma. Lisa also wanted to make sure we were able to cope with the challenges of our daily lives currently as well, and with the court case being ever so present in our lives, we had to wait on the EMDR.
And honestly, I'm not 100% sure we are doing full blown EMDR. I know that Lisa is really trying to adjust what she is doing with how Penelope is doing. We haven't addressed the big items but are starting out with smaller ones and I'm guessing, letting Penelope get familiar with the process as well as continue to build that relationship between them.
I do feel like Penelope has began to lose her babyish stuff. It's still there and especially with the news of moving and some of the problems she has created for herself at school, but in general, I hear an older child, almost 13 a great deal of time. Do I think she is calmer? Maybe, a little bit. Or it's just that the older Penelope seems calmer. It could be related to the EMDR, or it may not be. But I have to say, it's the first time she has had consistent periods of normal speech unrelated to her mood. At least at home.
I recently learned she is having issues with baby-talking at school. I do know she is dealing with fear-based controlling compulsions at school. I get calls from school on a daily basis it seems - sometimes multiple times a day. She was late for school last Thursday. She was called into the Asst. Principal's office and (allegedly) given a detention for Tuesday. Tuesday rolled around and Penelope did not go to detention. I received a call from Penelope at the end of the school day saying that a boy named Joe asked her if she wanted to come over his house and do homework. Penelope and Joe have crushes on each other. Penelope goes all valley girl when talking about him. "OMG!" Anyway, it wasn't going to happen because..... well... hell hasn't frozen over yet. I told her that she could have him come to OUR house on Friday but for only a couple of hours. I can monitor them that way and keep everyone safe. Penelope is really good at appearing trustworthy. But I digress. On Wednesday, the reported events went like this:
2nd bell Gym - hit in eye with dodge-ball and went to the nurse
3rd bell - Called into Asst. Principal's office and "yelled at" for skipping detention. Given a Friday Study (longer detention on Friday) for skipping detention when she claims he never gave her the detention slip. She claims she actually said "Show me proof" to him. Doh! Could that be that I require proof/verification on just about everything? Or is that just Penelope raising herself on her tipy toes to be nose to nose with him? She said he didn't respond. I told her he didn't have to.
After that meeting she went back to class and vented to her teacher, the Intervention Specialist. I don't know if she said this to the Asst. Principal or not, but she said this to her teacher, that she can't on Friday because she already has plans. You know... with Joe? Penelope was very angry with the Asst. Principal telling her teacher over and over that "he doesn't have that kind of power of me " and "it's him or me." She told him he does have that power. He is actually her boss and if she was late over and over again, he could fire her. She was able to get her to calm down somewhat and take a test she had in English.
After class, instead of going to Social Studies she went to the office and asked to call her Papaw. She called him and started sobbing on the phone wanting him to come pick her up telling him her version of how the day went down. She just couldn't make it through the rest of the day. He told her he couldn't and she needed to make it through which was just a couple more hours. This is when I learned about it as he called me to give me the heads up. I was surprised she didn't call me but I think it's because she knows I would know what parts weren't true and wanted someone to have full sympathy for her plight. I did the whole empathy thing, and I truly felt sad for her having a rough day but at her own doing. I'm glad that her visit with Joe will be cut short because it makes the consequences of her behavior more painful and more of a natural consequence. She doesn't have therapy on Thursday like usual so she wanted to move her visit with Joe until then. Oh no. I told her it was too late to make changes like that being Wednesday night and we just needed to stick to the schedule.
She has been on time this week, close calls two of the 4 days so far. So no more detentions after Friday based on any current happenings. She has been easier in the morning since these detentions. I'm hoping she will start making better decisions. I'm trying to keep do more fun things with her so that her self-confidence increases and help her make better decisions. I'm not real sure how to help school with her control compulsion. I'm not sure what's causing it.